True Reports!

Lisa/Colin · Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 12:21 am Post subject: True Reports!

True Reports from British life .........!!!

BRITISH NEWSPAPERS

Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, 'We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house.'
(The Daily Telegraph)

Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole salami in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing her Italian boyfriend.
(The Manchester Evening News)

Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like.
(The Guardian)

A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guard spokesman commented, 'This sort of thing is all too common'.
(The Times)

At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coast guard and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff.
( Aberdeen Evening Express)

Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue , Boscombe, delighted the audience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled -
'He'd always seemed a nice friendly chap, but when the crocuses came up in the middle of our lawn in February 1946, they spelt out 'Heil Hitler.''
( Bournemouth Evening Echo)

Laughing

Colin

maureenmcl · Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 8:23 am Post subject:

geri carroll · Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:08 am Post subject:

enjoyed them all...esp the first

Lisa/Colin · Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:10 am Post subject:

me too Geri i think the inflatable teeth and gas ones are so funny Laughing

Colin

Jack · Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 6:29 pm Post subject:

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Staffies are my life! Visit us at www.staffies.co.uk

Lisa/Colin · Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 10:31 pm Post subject:

Hey all ,try this ,it warps your head !!!

http://www.reallywarped.com/CoolArt.htm

Colin

Dave Rowland · Posted: Thu Feb 26, 2009 12:28 am Post subject:

seem some b4, but there is some great ones there
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Quoting Jack: you know me - a complete hopeless case & Sadly - and mark it in your diaries folks as you won't see this happen often - but <gulp> I HAVE to agree with Dave on this.
Quoting Kendal: coulu you decapitate innes for me please

jackdeb · Posted: Thu Feb 26, 2009 10:26 am Post subject:

Hey Colin.

They reports are good.

My fav is from the Aberdeen Evening Express.

The cool art is good I have seen most of it before but its still amazing.

Jack
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springers rule!!! our house

graceb · Posted: Thu Feb 26, 2009 11:46 am Post subject:

Enjoyed the cool art Laughing

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Grace & Dexter



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